And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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