my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
