i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Randomize
