$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
