so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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