Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
You were trust falling into bushes
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
