singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
