seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
