ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
