i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
