Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
