do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
