I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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