and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize