I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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