Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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