Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
