He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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