I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
