Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
