i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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