just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
