Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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