Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
