Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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