if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize