Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
kristin has been a bad kristin
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
