quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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