We won't sleep together?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
