Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Are my feet made of real feet?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
