Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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