i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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