in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
