I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize