We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize