If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
