If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
