I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
