My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Randomize
