Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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