I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
