guys are not supposed to queef...right?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
