It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
