Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
