butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
