You're completely useless in the revolution.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
