I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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