i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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