I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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