i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize