But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
