You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize